Monday, October 11, 2010

Not Your Ordinary Princess

OK for those of you who don't know me or for the sake of this blog are new to my world... up till like today I have been a full time student working on her bachelor’s in Multi Media and Web Design. I am waiting the results of my appeal to see if I will be allowed to return to class tomorrow. Long story Short the D I got in my Photo Shop Class dropped my GPA down too low and now I maybe screwed. Somehow I am not that surprised and chalk it up to the long list of screw jobs I have gotten over the years. I am not saying it’s all someone else fault there needs to be some blame at my own feet and I am a big enough girl to know I am a fuck up thank you very much. However I got an ass chewing for something I never should have gotten and I was done wrong on a few levels. I was scared to do my project because it offended someone... Now normally I would tell the person to go fuck themselves but in this case I was trying to take the higher road... it blew up in my face and I had not only my mothering challenged but my Ethics, Morals and beliefs challenged and belittled.. All because I choose to pick a book about 2 men who would go to the ends of the world to save their family They are 2 of the hottest guys in books and written by one of the greatest gay erotic fiction writers in the world. I was Thrilled to be allowed to pretend to make his book into a DVD cover and Website. BTW I got a crappy grade I don't think it deserved because the website and the DVD cover were supposed to look alike... Hello in the real world do Movie DVD covers Look like the Movie Website??? I don't think so!!! I thought the teacher at least was going to grade my roughs but she didn’t... not that it would save me because sadly it won’t bring my GPA up enough... I am a good girl I try hard... I am what I am and I don’t want to change who or what I am... I don’t think I should to get by in school... I spent the last 4 terms playing nice... I use my clothed pictures of guys instead of the naked ones and I am super aware to no offend... So this semester threw me and threw me hard... I have lost my will to fight to write and to just be me... I still to this day do not understand what I did or said that offended this woman and sadly I don’t think I ever will... If I get to return to classes I have 2 ethics classes and a math this term... little known fact my ethics aren’t normal either lol... So this not so ordinary princess has her tiara in a knot and doesn’t know what to do... any thoughts feelings or suggestions?